Monday, September 27, 2004

City Of Dallas Building - A.K.A. The Largest Public Outhouse

I just got back from the longest wait at the DMV. I call it the DMV because back where I'm from that's what we call it. Here in Texas it's called the Department of Public Safety. I'll just keep referring to it as the Department of Motor Vehicles.

After passing the building 4 times without knowing that is where I was supposed to be, I stopped the first "normal" looking person I saw and asked them where it was. They pointed to the very large building I kept passing. I felt quite stupid.

I walked to the front of the building and boy did it stink! The smell of pee was so bad that I gagged. I held my breath and quickly made my way inside and asked the rent-a-cop at the front desk where I was supposed to go. She was really nice and helped me with my directions. I ended up waiting for 1 1/2 hours! I kept myself amused by noticing the people working at the front desk. They didn't seem like they enjoyed their job. You know someone doesn't enjoy their job when they casually throw the word "shit" out and not care that they work in such a public setting.

But now I can drive without any worries. I'll just have to make do with that little piece of paper for about 4 weeks or so.

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

Just A Bundle Of Nerves.

I'm extremely nervous/scared about my interview tomorrow. I sort of have this tendency to anticipate the best and end up disappointed when it doesn't pan out. I'm trying my hardest not to expect ANYTHING out of this interview, but I can't help it. I keep going over different scenarios in my head. This, of course, is 1 of the 2 companies I dream about working for. I think I need some therapy. get my mind off of this, I was thinking about some of the random things that go through my mind throughout the day:

1. Why do some people wear jeans to the gym?
2. Don't people realize it's icky to leave a workout machine dripping with their sweat after they are done?
3. Is there really a need to block off 10 miles of a freeway lane for absolutely no reason whatsoever?
4. Why does your nose burn when you burp after drinking Dr. Pepper, but never any other soda?
5. Does the above phenomena just happen to me?
6. Just how many "versions" of Law and Order and CSI can there possibly be before they all start to look alike?
7. Why do I find Angelina Jolie extremely hot?
8. Am I the only one who thinks Madonna has finally gone cooky?
9. Is it just me, or are department stores seem to be putting out Christmas items earlier and earlier every year?
10. Which is better: Wal Mart or Target? Target or Wal Mart? Who's to say!?!?

Monday, September 20, 2004

Hold The Pepto Please!

This weekend, Carrie ended up not having to use pepto. She got over her stressed-induced bout of diarrhea. I took her to JR's and I was laughing because she looked like a small town tourist in a big city for the first time. All she kept saying was, "All these guys are gay? What a waste!" I bought her 1 drink and well....that did it!! The funniest part of the night though was when I took her to The Male Boxx. Maybe this wasn't a very good idea because it was sort of like throwing her to the wolves. I warned her that there were dancers at this place. She was cool with that. BUT.....we walked in and started making our way to the other side and she made a u-turn and started heading towards the door. She was laughing so hard. She said she wasn't expecting to see that!!!

What she saw was a dancer in a, shall we say, revealing outfit. It left nothing to the imagnation. After composing herself we made it back to the other side to get a drink and hav ea seat. I was watching her and I caught her looking out of the corner of her eye at this dancer!!! She said, "I can't help it! If anything that big wanted to be used on me I'd have to say no!" We left after 1 drink. Then she confessed that she had no clue what this guy looked like in the face. She ended up just gawking from the waist down.

We did make it an early night though because I knew that it was way past her bedtime. She said she had a very fun time though.

Friday, September 17, 2004

Gotta Go Gotta Go Gotta Go Right Now....

So tonight I'm going to see the motion picture "Hero" with Cesar and Ivan. I'm taking my friend Carrie because her son is having a sleep over at a buddy of his tonight and she never gets a break from her role as Parental Unit. After the movie we're heading out to Dallas. She's so funny. I talked to her this morning and she said that it's been so long since she's gone out (literally years) that's she's so nervous that she has diarrhea. I told her to bring a bottle of Pepto Bismol.

Monday, September 13, 2004

Oy Vey!!!

I caught up on some much needed sleep this weekend. Friday night I had made plans with Lamont to go see "Resident Evil: Apocalypse" and I liked it! It was much better than the first one. Plus it's always fun to watch movies with Lamont....especially ones where I have to explan a number of things. For example, why the character Jill Valentine rushes out of her house and the first outfit she finds to put on in a moments notice consists of combat boots, a VERY short mini-skirt and a halter top. It's just funny to hear him say outloud, "Now why does she run out of her house looking like a hooker??"

I had actually almost over slept. When I got home from work I decided to take a power nap. Next thing I know it's pitch black and my clock says it's 8:58. The movies starts at 9:30 and I told Lamont that he MUST meet me at 9:15 because he knows how pissy I get if I miss my previews. I jumped outta bed stumbling around my dark room trying to find my shoes. I left without even taking a chance to see what kind of hell I looked like!!! Anyhow we had a good time. It was good to spend time with him.

On Saturday Alex had anothe poker party. I didn't want to be there so I called Cesar to see what he was doing. I had actually found this HUGE bottle of wine in our pantry and I decided to chill it and head over to Cesars with it. I got there around 6:30 and we left to go get some fancy meats and cheeses to have with our wine. The wine actually wasn't all that great. After 4 or 5 glasses it just tasted like shit. Needless to say this didn't stop us from almost finishing the bottle. So we left around 9:45 to Dallas to meet up with Sergio in Gayville. I slept at Cesars because I had to be at my friend Carries house at 8:00 and she lives 1 exit from Cesar. After going to bed around 4 am I was extremely tired. I didn't get home until 11:30 Sunday morning and slept until 4:30 that afternoon. During my slumber, Alex proceeded to leave me a note on the 'fridge that he was going to stay the night at Justins and would be home in the morning. Now....on to the drama!!!

Ok....before I went to bed I made sure that the house was locked up tight and that the spotlight over the garage was on to ward off any would-be intruders. I went to bed knowing that I was alone in the house only to be woken up by a knocking on my bedroom door. Talk about messing myself! This scared the living shit out of me!!! I didn't know what to do so I did what I used to do when I was little and was scared.....I pretended to be alseep. The knocking continued and I heard "Chico, can I come in??" It was Alex. I told him to come in and chided him for scaring me. At this point it's 3:30 in the morning and he says "Can I talk to you about Justin?" Being the lovely and caring person that I am, I scooted over on my bed so he could sit. He told me that he came home because there were random people over Justins apartment. Justin went to the store and ended up bringing this very young person with him. Alex asked who he was and Justin said that it was a friend of Ryans (one of the other people who was over.)

Well....about 30 minutes later or so Justin says that he is walking this other person out because he is going home and ends up grabbing his car keys. Alex thought this was weird because Justin told him they all had cars. At this point Justin's roommate Mark comes in and tells Alex that he has something to tell him. Mark tells Alex that Justin has been smoking out for about 7 days straight and that he overheard him say that he was going to get his rent money after he goes over to a "friends house who works in Dallas until 6:00 and take some of his stuff to pawn on Monday." This freaks Alex out and he begins to wonder if that random person that Justin brought over is his dealer. Alex grabs his shit and heads out the door. He then catches Justin in the car with the boy doing naughty naughty things. Apparently Justin is turning tricks for his fix!!! Yeah.....I know. this point I'm beyond pissed about this. (See posting from 9/5 about the house key) I told Alex that he must leave work tomorrow morning around 10:30 to come home and change out all the locks on the house. I told him to ask the little old lady across to street to call the cops and his cell if she sees Justin's car outside. This woman is kinda the neighborhood watch dog. Then, when Justin calls you tomorrow (and he will) casually mention that you are having Brinks security come out today to activate the security system after a long delay. I also told him to call up the place where he will start working on Tuesday (courtesy of Alex who got him the job) and inform Jim (the manager and dear friend of Alex ) of what is going on.

So now it is 4:00 in the morning and I cannot get back to sleep. I ended up tossing and turning until the alarm went off at 7:15. I'm surprisingly not as tired as I was a couple of hours ago, but I know it's going to hit me around 3:00.

I don't know where Alex finds these winners from!! It's just one thing after another when it comes to the people he takes an interest in. Damnit....learn from your mistakes!!! If I meet someone and I find that they have been unemployed for 9 months, is about to have their car repoed for missing 3 payments and is risking being evitcted I would kick them to the curb! Will he ever learn???

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

"911, What Is Your Emergency?"

This is from the Taipei Times posted on Sept. 7. Read the second story.

I haven't yet quite figured out how to link things, so just copy and paste. Plus when you do this on a Mac all the options don't appear as buttons.

Crazy people!

Sunday, September 05, 2004

And The Award For Best Dramatic Performance Goes To........

Alex gave another Academy Award winning performance this weekend. If you look up the word "hypochondriac" in the dictionary you will find his picture. What took the cake was on Friday. He didn't make it into work until about 1:15 that afternoon. I had gone to see a client and was pulling into the parking garage when I saw him pull in behind me. He got out of his truck clutching a box of tissue in one arm and a carton (not a small bottle, but a whole carton!) of orange juice in the other. I swear you would have thought he was on his death bed. All he had was a little head cold. I looked at him and started to laugh. He asked what I was laughing about and I told him that he was being just a bit dramatic. Then I proceeded up the elevator.

So.....what this led to was his loser boyfriend staying ANOTHER weekend here. Surprisingly, Alex seemed to make a miracalous (spelling?) recovery by the time I got home from work around 5:30 or so. He had actually left to go back home around 2:30. When I drove up only Alex's truck was here. I was sitting on the couch watching The Simpsons when the door unlocked and in walks Justin (his current flavor of the week). This didn't sit too well with me. First of all, it scared the shit out of me because the only 2 people who have keys were home: me and Alex. I looked at Justin and asked if Alex had given him his set of keys and he said that Alex GAVE him a house key. This irks me beyond belief. First of all, this guy has only been around for a couple of weeks and Alex is already giving him a key to the house?? So I told Justin that I would appreciate it if instead of just coming in when my car is here if he would knock or ring the doorbell. If Alex is the only one here then fine......let yourself in. I live here too and I don't appreciate it when people who's last name I don't even know just lets themselves in. He just gave me this odd look and went to the other side of the house.

Am I being too dramatic myself? Or am I in the right?

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

No More Bush! I was treking to work this morning listening to news radio 1080 AM KRLD as I do every morning and they did a piece on the Republican National Convention. It was said that the average age of an attendee at this convention was 54!! WOW! Then they said that close to 1000 protesters were arrested last night. This is clearly a sign that people are fed up with the current administration. I have just sent in my voter registration and put down myself as a Democrat. Even though I live in a state that is overwhelmingly Republican, I feel that it is my DUTY to vote in November. I urge everyone to do the same. Even if you know that your state is going to go to Bush, STILL VOTE! I think that there are many people who don't vote because they feel it won't make a difference. But let me tell you.....if these large numbers get off their butt on Nov. 3, it will show that in these Republican states there are a large number of Democrats who won't sit by and do nothing. SO DO IT!

I was also telling my dear friend Carrie Marie Torres this story about my frustration with people who talk about things and tend to contradict themselves. I was getting a hair cut a few weeks back (I always go to the same person) and the stylist next to her was cutting this mans hair. As it usually happens, that stylist started making small talk with her client and asked him if he was ready to vote in November. First thought that popped in my head was "Oh Jesus here we go!" He proceeded to say that regardless he ALWAYS votes Republican. WHAT?? I wanted to turn to him and ask him why he is voting straight Republican when in the same breath he's commenting on some of the things that he disagrees with Bush and the Republican party about, especially if they are major things! Then his stylist proceeded to say she does the same thing, commented on how she thought Theresa Heinz-Kerry is a bitch and that after she found out Mrs. Heinz-Kerry is from the Heinz fortune she threw out ALL her Heinz products from her refrigerator. She will NEVER buy another Heinz product again. What the hell? How stupid can you be? But I just held my tongue. There are some topics that just end up getting too heated.

I think next time I'll walk in with a Heinz ketchup bottle and squirt her with it.